Grumpy Trants

Trants is grumpy today. I'm feeling a sort of rough irritation in the back of my brain, as though my spine was a blackboard and God was scratching His nails up and down it. You know how cats and dogs raise their hackles when they feel threatened? How that low, rumbling, satisfying rrrrrr sounds in the back of their throats? That's me today. rrrrrrrrrrrr.

I don't know what's got me so riled. Could be that the dog slept with me last night, and woke me up to go out while I was right in the middle of a dream. I was singing songs from "Annie" in Eastview Mall, and there was a crowd watching me. I woke up during the stirring finale, where our acting troupe was lighting firecrackers and sparklers and singing, "That Fourth of July kid!" So it could be that my raised hackles actually stem from the frustration of not being allowed to finish my showstopper. Am I that much of a diva that an unrequited dream could ruin my day? Naw, don't answer that. It was a rhetorical question.

Or it could be the episode that followed after, in which I took both dogs outside for their morning constitutional and was met with Invasion. Two other dogs were usurping territory. Granted, that territory was on the other side of the road, which neither I nor my family actually own, but dogs do not have the same boundaries as people. To our dogs, these strangers were threatening the homestead. Lucky for me, every dog was leashed, and so it was just a lot of growling and glowering, rather than outright biting and bleeding. I held them back with my superstrength, and this while not wearing a bra beneath my nightshirt. Holding back two dogs and flopping while doing so might put even Ghandi in a bad mood. But did he have DDD breasts?

Or, finally, it could be the scene where my mother flexed her managerial muscles and actually CRITICIZED my sales skills. What, you say? She dared? Yes, she did. I handled it well, though. I cried. Yep, I've got a thick, tough skin.

So perhaps it is all these incidents combined that puts me in a toxic mood. I've been up for exactly 33 minutes, and damn if I don't want to go right back to bed.

RRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrr.

The dots were hurting my brain.

I'll try this for a while and see if the ache goes away.

No noteworthy events. I'm at college this morning; I'm waiting for the fitness center to open so I can exercise. Caught Scholar looking at another woman's underwear (thong?) the other day (and no, it was not her fault, so she shouldn't feel guilty. To be honest, I might have looked too, if I hadn't had my head in the bag of Cheddar and Sour Cream chips). I have decided that Scholar needs to be reminded of the glory that is Trants.

Which means Trants must manifest her glory. This will take some sweat and sacrifice, but I'm ready. I am adamant that I will be well on my way to full Glory Manifestation by December. Santa will bring me clothing in a much smaller size this year. Of course, if he brings me a thong, I will choke him with it.

Ho Ho Ho!

More close, more comfort...

I like this result a little better. Maybe it's the absence of the word "weird"...

TRANTS IS AN ENFP (according to the incredibly accurate Myers-Briggs Personality Inventory). ENFPs are called "Champion Idealists."

Champion Idealists:

The Champion Idealists are abstract in thought and speech, cooperative in accomplishing their aims, and informative and extraverted when relating with others. For Champions, nothing occurs which does not have some deep ethical significance, and this, coupled with their uncanny sense of the motivations of others, gives them a talent for seeing life as an exciting drama, pregnant with possibilities for both good and evil. This type is found in only about 3 percent of the general population, but they have great influence because of their extraordinary impact on others. Champions are inclined to go everywhere and look into everything that has to do with the advance of good and the retreat of evil in the world. They can't bear to miss out on what is going on around them; they must experience, first hand, all the significant social events that affect our lives. And then they are eager to relate the stories they've uncovered, hoping to disclose the "truth" of people and issues, and to advocate causes. This strong drive to unveil current events can make them tireless in conversing with others, like fountains that bubble and splash, spilling over their own words to get it all out.
Champions consider intense emotional experiences as being vital to a full life, although they can never quite shake the feeling that a part of themselves is split off, uninvolved in the experience. Thus, while they strive for emotional congruency, they often see themselves in some danger of losing touch with their real feelings, which Champions possess in a wide range and variety. In the same vein, Champions strive toward a kind of spontaneous personal authenticity, and this intention always to "be themselves" is usually communicated nonverbally to others, who find it quite attractive. All too often, however, Champions fall short in their efforts to be authentic, and they tend to heap coals of fire on themselves, berating themselves for the slightest self-conscious role-playing.