Last night, I dreamed of our daughter

She had the most beautiful smile.

I'm lucky with my dreaming; sometimes, I have the most vivid, cinematic visions and when I wake up, I feel certain that I've looked through some sort of window. I'm not saying I see the future. No, it's more like an insight -- a glimpse of The Truth. I don't always understand it. I just know that whatever it is, it's important. It's a barometer of my inner self, how things are going, how hopeful or despairing I feel. Obviously, I'm feeling pretty hopeful.

It's no secret that I'm ready for a family. What's exciting is that Scholar is ready too; he brings the subject up on his own, and freely talks about our children. It's a much better time for this kind of talk, even though there's still a lot of prepping to do. I just signed up for fall classes, after all.

But last night...this dream...

I've always been so jealous of my friends who have children--especially Cin, because Na-Na has the Sweetest Smile Ever. Her other daughter, Harm, is wonderful too, but older. I got to see Na when she was little. I was still bruised, and I really didn't want to fall in love with her. I tried to stay away for a while, maybe forever, but Cin was having none of that. And when I finally met the child, she flashed me this heart-melting smile and I was done. I don't mind admitting that I have coveted that smile.

But after last night's dream, I would just like to say that I might get one of my own. Dream Baby had a scream like a siren (I told you my dreams were cinematic), but a smile like the sun breaking through clouds.

Look out, Nadia.